Post Partum Part 2

The last couple days have been better regarding my bout with baby blues. I still have my moments though. The holidays have helped because we've been busy, but when I'm home alone all day it's another story. I don't want to be stuck at home alone with Remington. Even if there's one more person around it's better. When someone is around then I can talk to them and they can take care of Remington for even a couple minutes so I can have a short break, even if it's just to run to the restroom. So, in order to cope I've been going on Wal-mart runs and going over to my parents' house. It has helped, but I still get down. For instance, last night after spending the day at my parents, I cried coming home. I don't know why, just because. It wasn't even because I was going home to be by myself, because Landon was home. It was just because I was now responsible for Remington again.

I feel bad for Landon too, because he's been working so much overtime. Christmas day was the first day he's had off in awhile and he's been working 6am to 6pm (when he leaves home and gets back home). By the time he gets home it's about time to get Remington ready for bed. The only time Landon really gets to spend with his son is when we're putting him to bed, and I've posted before about what a chore that is.

I don't know what it's going to be like starting next week. I have to go back to work and I'm not looking forward to it. I know I'm going to miss Remington.

Stress of being home with baby

After my last post my bit of postpartum blues became worse. All most all day Thursday, I cried and felt horrible. I missed Landon so much. I couldn't get anything done all day because every time I put Remington down, even if he was sound asleep, he would wake up and start crying. I also think he's going through a growth spurt because he's eating all the time too. People on Facebook have helped a lot with advice and support. I just feel so overwhelmed.

So Landon told me that Saturday would be a day all to myself. It was my 26th birthday anyway. That morning, Landon and I drove over to my parent's house and left Remington with them all day. We then went to Hutchinson to shop and run errands. Landon also took me out to eat for my birthday. I was also amazed to receive my birthday present of a brand new DSLR camera, a Canon Rebel! Wow! I was not expecting such a great gift. We then drove back home to clean the house and get it ready for Landon's family Christmas at our house next weekend. We then planned to pick up Remington around 8pm or so. Landon's mom was going to drive through Lyons and come to our house anyway, so she picked up Remington and brought him to our house so we wouldn't have to make a trip back to Lyons to get him.

I was glad to have the break and thought I was good and done with being overwhelmed until this afternoon. Remington continues to constantly want to be held. I started crying again, which sucks, because I have never been a crier and I hate it. I called my mom for advice and now I feel much better. She's raised 5 kids, so she knows a thing or two about babies, of course. Just talking to someone helped a lot. For now, I'm good and happy again, but I'll keep everyone updated. I'll also post later about what works to keep Remington happy besides being held constantly. It's not bad to hold him, it's just that I can't get anything done and he has to get used to not being held. The day care lady can't hold him all day and that's coming up in a couple weeks, which is a whole other stressor that I'll wait for later to discuss...